Things to tell your kids as they grow up!

Things to tell your kids as they grow up!

You know the ones. Like carrots give you good eyesight and shit.


I heard Gordon Ramsey say this one to his kid son. "If you don't eat your greens your widgy won't grow!" Genius!

"Martin! What d'ya mean by leaving these funny, stiff stains on the guest towels? Eh? Eh?

Wank and you go blind

Be sensible with your money

Not funny but damn true

Also

Stick in at school, you'll have more fun in later life spending your money even if the 'cool kids' appear to be having fun now farting about!

2 bits of advice i should have listened too

When I went to Uni, my dad siad that the best bit of advice he had been told so was passing onto me was that you always have to think positive. No matter how shit or down you are feeling you HAVE to look at the positives or else you'll just stay sad for a very long time. It sounds like an easy bit of advice but it's one of the hardest to follow

Stella is good but gets u far too wrecked,,,,

stick with carling an u'll easily see the A.M

lmao

Pet it to wet it

Always Pre-heat the oven

and foil chillums are wank,,,ur dad will never miss the big socket out of his set

1 finger, 2 finger, 3 finger, fist

I like that one

if ya grow huge tits,,send a pic to the press,,ur bound to get some dollar 4 it

and trickle lives by that to this day

So did all of your parents tell you these things as kids?

You all have boring ones!

you give us some better ones then jess

Really?

I await your profound and exciting ones...

erm ok here goes...

When camping don't use a nettle as toilet roll?